


When I Hear Your Body Move

by Princessunicornblue



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: As implied as I can make it, He's literally listening in on them, I Tried, I don't even know if it counts, I guess its kinda sexual, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Non-Consensual Voyeurism, Not A Fix-It, Not Steve Friendly, Really deep thoughts, Smut, Unrequited Love, not really - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-15
Updated: 2018-11-09
Packaged: 2019-02-03 00:25:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12737322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Princessunicornblue/pseuds/Princessunicornblue
Summary: Despite all his pretending that it didn't bother him, that he couldn't hear it. It totally did. He tried his best to focus in on the conversations around him, the sounds of the city outside the tower, the beating of his heart, anything but that noise. And no one else could hear it but him. That breathy sigh. The hiccuped gasp. And the soft moan that was muffled by something, a pillow most likely. But the thing that bothered him most was the low chuckle, the gentle shushing, and murmured praise that accompanied each sensual sound





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing something that describes anything remotely heated between two people. I generally have no experience writing *that* and I kinda wanted to learn how to do it. God, It sounds like I'm trying to explain sex without actually saying it. Ugh, whatever. Enjoy this crap while you can. I'm trying to get points in my XP.
> 
> Inspired from In The Next Room by Neon Trees.

Despite all his pretending that it didn't bother him, that he couldn't hear it. It totally did. He tried his best to focus in on the conversations around him, the sounds of the city outside the tower, the beating of his heart, anything but that noise. And no one else could hear it but him. That breathy sigh. The hiccuped gasp. And the soft moan that was muffled by something, a pillow most likely. But the thing that bothered him most was the low chuckle, the gentle shushing, and murmured praise that accompanied each sensual sound. The rustling of sheets preceded the wet squelching sound that was practically ear-shattering from his intense focus on listening.

"Just a little bit more, Doll. You've been so good so far, just a little more."

He began to imagine himself in the same setting. Him inflicting the same sort of pleasure on the beautiful body beneath him. His hands running over warm, supple flesh that quivered under his touch. His eyes taking in the sight beneath him, the light sheen of sweat glistening in the low lights in the room. Savoring the sounds, sights, taste, and feeling of his partner under him. Those soulful brown eyes hooded beneath thick lashes, staring lustfully back at him as he drove his hips in and out to chase pleasure. Those plump lips parted in ecstasy, crying out and giving satisfied moans as they both rocked together. And the tanned expanse of skin, stretched out for him to touch and taste as they reached climax. The heat between them too much, both shouting their names to the heavens. Oh, how he wanted that body underneath him. To find himself sharing such an intimate moment with the person of his fantasies.

But it wasn't his name that was being called out in the throes of passion. It wasn't his hands and eyes cataloging different reactions to the movements between them. It wasn't his lips kissing the object of his affections'. He wasn't the lover in the room. It was his best friend.

"Mmm, James." He pretended that the name being said was his. That it was him, that he could have that voice calling for him. _"_ It feels good."

It hurt. Wanting, but not being able to touch. Having to watch the man he loved and his best friend 'til the end of the line do the things he wanted most. Seeing their hands linked tightly, kissing passionately despite noises of complaint from the others witnessing the acts. Having to listen to intimate moments like this and wonder what it would be like if the roles were reversed. Listening to the sappy nicknames they shared, the pleased noises when kisses were shared. It hurt to have his two worlds together and dangled in his face. The adoration they shared a bright message of _‘You Can't Have This’._

But the thing that hurt the most, was the change in attitude when they all came back home. The way the smaller man would flinch and jerk away from him if he moved too quickly, the distrusting look in his eyes if he made any sort of remark on how he was concerned about him. And the way his best friend was slowly distancing himself away from him. Avoiding him and pretending he had other plans, until one day, both men were happily in a relationship. The comments of _"Aww, they're so cute together."_ and _"I hear wedding bells”_ broke him. The realization that he messed up whatever chance he could have had just added to the pain already felt. And he could only smile through it all, pretend that everything was alright, and move on.

As the muffled moans increased in tempo and volume, he clenched his hands by his sides and prayed to anyone listening that the torture would end. He couldn’t bear to stand another second. If anyone normal just strained their ears beyond the sound of the movie starting in front of them, they could hear exactly what he could. The sounds that haunted him, that jeered and taunted him while he was awake and sleeping.

Eventually, his prayers were answered, the moaning and slight creaking of the bedsprings had stopped and were replaced with breathless pants. Another thing that bothered him. Only moments passed before both men entered the communal area in time for the movie’s main menu to appear.

“Just in time.” the smaller man mumbled as he wormed his way into a space on the couch. That left the other man to sit next to him, two best friends sharing a seat together.

“Steve, you okay?”

Apparently, he hadn’t relaxed his fists, tightly clenched to his sides, which made the other man worry that something was wrong with him. He glanced over at Tony, squeezed between Bruce and Vision, and saw the lovebites littering his tanned skin. It sent pangs of hurt through his veins and he wanted to wail and slam his fists down on the couch in a tantrum on how unfair it all was.

“It’s nothing.” He lied. “I’m okay.”

And despite the obvious blip in his heartbeat that Bucky was sure to have heard, he didn’t broach the subject again. He didn’t assure him that he would ask sometime later. He just shrugged and turned back to the movie, occasionally laughing at the corny jokes and equally corny plot.

And Steve? Steve just pretended that he wasn’t breaking apart again at the sight of what he lost. After all, it wasn’t the first time.


	2. The Silence is Ringing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Touch had always been the best part of their relationship. It showed a deep intimacy and trust between them. Tony hadn't always been touched by people all his life, his father wasn't very forthcoming with it and his mother only handled him at certain times. Tony had always been desperate for a hand to brush by him, an arm around his shoulders, or someone's chest plastered to his body as they passed by. He noticed it, saw the needy look in his eyes when someone gave him the barest of pats on his head or held his hand in companionship. It was sweet and oh, so heartbreaking to look at. And when he increased the contact between them, it was exhilarating.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, I didn't want to make another part of this, didn't even plan on doing it. But it was six in the morning and inspiration hit me when I was listening to Troye and then, this baby was born. I cannot believe that it has almost been a year since I first posted this fic. Like wow, coincidence huh?

Touch had always been the best part of their relationship. It showed a deep intimacy and trust between them. Tony hadn't always been touched by people all his life, his father wasn't very forthcoming with it and his mother only handled him at certain times. Tony had always been desperate for a hand to brush by him, an arm around his shoulders, or someone's chest plastered to his body as they passed by. He noticed it, saw the needy look in his eyes when someone gave him the barest of pats on his head or held his hand in companionship. It was sweet and oh, so heartbreaking to look at. And when he increased the contact between them, it was exhilarating.

Every time he ran his hands across sweaty, olive-toned skin when they sparred, it sent a heady feeling into his head. A rush of endorphins that tingled in his skull and zinged down to his belly, pooling low into his groin until he was heavy-eyed and so hard it hurt. He noticed the aroused looks Tony would give him when his touches lingered, when he wrapped his hands around his waist as he passed the smaller man in the kitchen. It was obvious then, that they were attracted to each other, despite the loud arguments that took place between them. They were somewhat expected to end up together, to be destined for one another.

But it only lasted one night, one night amidst the searching for the Winter Soldier and keeping secrets from Tony. One night in the tower, when the tension had been too high and Steve wanted Tony to stop asking questions about what he was searching for. All it had really taken was a hand on the nape of the neck, weighing him down a bit before kissing him passionately. Tony had been so responsive, warm and pliant as he wrapped him up in his arms. He fell into his embrace like he needed it, like it was what he was born for. In that moment, Steve knew exactly how to remake Tony Stark.

* * *

 

Coming back to America from Wakanda was like stepping into a memory. Everything was the same, but it felt somewhat distant from reality. The array of team members from before the "Civil War" mess, gave him relief. Tony hadn't left the group and taken the others with him. Rhodes, Banner, Vision, and Thor stood to the left of Tony as a whole slew of heroes stood to the right and behind the man.

"Welcome back, I would greet you further but I don't have the time or patience to do so. Honey-bear, will you do the honors?"

Rhodes had a sinister smile on his face as his arms crossed over his chest. Tony took his leave, Banner sliding into his place next to the Iron Patriot.

The passive-aggressive speech that Rhodes gave them ended up being more of a thinly-veiled threat against them than a greeting to welcome them back. The introductions of both teams was awkward and rushed as no one wanted to really make friendly, despite some of them being former friends and all. Banner and Thor wouldn't touch them, preferring to throw shady looks whenever they looked in their direction. Vision was more amiable than most, but still was silent as he listened and watched the proceedings. It didn't take too long for him to notice that they weren't wanted back, that no one would be appreciative of their return.

* * *

 

 

Weeks had gone by without sight of Tony. It was like the genius had suddenly disappeared after they arrived. Any request of a second of his time had been shut down immediately, FRIDAY and the rest always telling them in a roundabout way that Tony didn't want to waste his time on them anymore. The only time they had seen any bit of him was on the television, when the billionaire was giving speeches or featuring at charity events halfway around the world. It was like he was ignoring them, pretending they didn't exist as long as he didn't have to see them.

Well, that was fine and all, but Steve could hold on a little longer. He had been frozen for seventy years, he could wait a little longer to speak to Tony.

* * *

 

Steve could smell the familiar scent of Tony's cologne before he walked in his direction. He was sitting at the island with Bucky, going over a few tactics that they had come up with before sending them over to Carol for approval.

Tony was looking much better than when he had last seen him. The olive tone to his skin had gotten just a shade or two darker, his curls more voluminous and wild, and the lines around his face less pronounced. The weeks away had done him good. And didn't that just say something about their return?

"Barnes," Tony called, not even looking in either of their direction as his fingers typed rapidly against the screen of his phone. "I have something for you to try out. Come down to my lab in an hour and we can start talking on it."

Bucky nodded before silently following after the shorter brunet. And that was where it started, the point where his life started to spiral out of control. It took ten months for it to become obvious to everyone, but he had known sooner than the others with the intensity that he watched them.

The absence of Bucky that happened every other day then clustered to every day and then he just stopped seeing Steve in general. Tony had been putting on an assured front, but every time he came close to Steve, he would start shaking like a frightened animal. Reaching past Tony to grab something or getting into an argument with the smaller man resulted in a full-body flinch that startled him without fail. Had he become so frightening to the other man that he couldn't react to him in a positive sense?

By eight months, Bucky was constantly with Tony or surrounded by his friends. Bucky's room on their side of the compound was full of the stuff he brought with him, but empty of said owner. He never came by to say hi, spend time, or even look in their direction. It was like the man he had been best friends with disappeared before his eyes.

* * *

 

"Tony? If its alright with you, I want to apologize for what I did to you. I should have just listened to you at the airport and at the task force center. I should have known that you were doing everything to help us, that you had a plan and to just leave it all to you. I shouldn't have gotten all up in my feelings, trying to keep Bucky with me. All I was doing was trying to keep my only piece of my past close to me. I was doing everything I could do to keep from grieving Peggy properly and it translated to me causing so much trouble for everyone. I'm sorry for everything. Lying to you, hurting you, and leaving you there without help. It was insensitive of me, downright despicable. I know that you don't have to forgive me, but just know that I regret doing it to you. I regret losing you. I miss you. I love you."

Steve backed away from the door of Tony's lab, not looking behind him to see if the dark blob that was Tony's shape was moving toward him. He had to back away, had to let him process what he had just said. This was Steve's real apology and he was glad that he got it right this time.

* * *

 

"I appreciate the apology you gave me a few days ago, but I don't think I can love you back from everything that happened between us. I think you should move on, find someone you don't have bad history with and move in that direction. If we got together it would just end badly, we don't mix well. We're always fighting and I don't think you really understand what we both need. Okay?"

Steve nodded, hands cupped tightly around the coffee mug Tony had handed him. He thought that with his apology that they could move forward, could get just a bit more closer to where they were meant to be. But it all felt as if he had taken ten steps back while Tony was in a different dimension from him. It was if it were all spinning out of his control, as if everything he knew were just a lie and he were only just learning the truth.

"Yeah, I can do that."

Tony stood from his seat on the couch, a thin smile pulling at his face as he made his way from the room. Before he could leave completely, Steve jumped to his feet and had a hand on his shoulder to stop him.

"Before you go, one last thing?"

"Yeah, what's th-"

Steve kissed him, arm wrapped around his waist and hand buried in his curls. It felt familiar to him, like an old song he knew all the words to. But it was different too, there was no reciprocated feelings on Tony's part. The one-sidedness of the kiss made it taste sour, rotten to the tongue as he held on longer to try and make it sweeter.

He heard footsteps suddenly stop behind him, a bundle of something soft hitting the floor with a hushed rustle.

Tony pushed at his chest, insistent and urgent as he looked over Steve's shoulder for whomever had walked in on the kiss. Bucky stood there, roses and daisies on the floor by his feet as he gazed at them with a dismayed expression on his face.

"James, I- I didn't." Tony stuttered, halting when Bucky simply just left. Shoulders hunched and arms wrapped around his torso, head down against his chest. He taste the salt of tears in the air, hear Tony's hitching breath as he sobbed next to him.

"Tony, I didn't know. I thought I-"

"That's it! You never think, you always do what you want regardless of what everyone else says or thinks. Well, good for you. You finally broke me, finally took the killing blow. Is that what you wanted, to see me suffer?"

"I never meant for this to happen. I didn't know, I didn't want to hurt you."

"Nonetheless, you did it anyway."

* * *

 

After a week of seeing neither Tony or Bucky, but knowing that they hadn't seen each other, Steve finally decided to make it all better.

"Buck, I know you're in there. I just want to talk to you."

"Why? So you can gloat about how much you and Tony love each other, how you were destined to be together? I think not, so just leave me the hell alone."

Steve sighed, sending a look to where he knew one of FRIDAY's sensors were, signaling her to let him in. Surprisingly, she allowed him in, after doing everything she could to make him miserable for making Tony and Bucky miserable in return.

"Why are you in here? FRIDAY, why'd you let him in?" Bucky asked, hidden under a thick blanket with the windows blacked out to let only the barest of light in. It was utterly depressing to look at Bucky, wallowing here in his room like this when he was the reason for this mess.

"As much as I don't like Mr. Rogers right now, I think it would be best if he told you what had transpired between himself and Boss."

Not wanting to be at the mercy of a petty and viciously vindictive AI that had control of all of the compound anymore, Steve steeled himself to tell the truth.

"Bucky, I made a mistake. I hurt you and Tony and now you're hurting Tony by not listening to him, which is unfair considering he wasn't really an active party in what happened. I was being an ass, doing what I wanted without thinking of how other people would feel about it. I didn't ask Tony if I could kiss him, I just did it because I still love him. But what I didn't know was that you two were already together. I just ruined your relationship because I was still hung up on what I couldn't have. It's all just a misunderstanding, something I would very much like to fix and move past."

"So you didn't even ask him if you could kiss him? Just grabbed him and laid one on him because you couldn't let him go?"

Steve nodded, not seeing the punch that landed smack dab in his face and forced him on his back. His nose was broken, bleeding on the white t-shirt he was wearing and some getting on the floor as he groaned at the pain.

"That's for kissing him without his permission, dumbass." Bucky growled, wiping the blood on his metal hand onto the leg of his pants. "I oughta kick your ass further but I think that was enough to bring some sense into you."

"Yeah, felt like it was enough."

* * *

 

After that, it really didn't get any better on his part. Tony and Bucky got together but were more public with their relationship. They were cute, a 'power couple' as Spiderman had put it one night after a large team dinner with everyone on the Avengers roster together. They were completely besotted with each other, never more than a few feet apart at the most with the way they clung to each other. The way they looked into the other's eyes was sickeningly sweet, enough for your teeth to fall out.

It made him sad, made him wish and cling to memories of when he and Tony had been close to that. When he and Tony had everyone wondering which of the two of them would pop the question first. He'd had so many scenarios in which it would happen. But now it seemed as if they would never happen. What was the point? The man he saw his whole life with was in love with someone else, in love with his best friend.

And the worst part was having to hear the sound of them getting intimate. To listen to Tony make the sounds he wanted to get to know better be made with another man. He wanted to feel his warmth again, taste his sweetness, hear the noises he made when he was deep in pleasure. Well, he could still hear it, just not with him involved.

And so he went out every now and then, seeking out a body to put his unreturned love into. And if some of his partners had some of Tony's characteristics, if he sometimes called them by his name in the throes of sex, it didn't matter. None of his pain mattered because he was done hurting Tony, even if it hurts himself in the process.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, if people continue to comment on this fic and give me ideas, then I may as well just continue adding onto this fic.


End file.
